Jokes

AIK DAFA AIK BHOOKA JALAIBION WALI DUKAN RER KHARA HOTA HAI AIK SHAIKH SAAB ATAY HAIN AUR JALAIBIAN LAIKAR KHANAY LAGTAY HAI BHOOKA BOLTA HAI SHAIKH SAAB JALAIBIAN MEETHI HAIN?SHAIKHSAAB BOLTAY HAIN NAHI AAJ NAMKEEN BANAI HAIN.

EK PAGAL NAY DOOSRAY PAGAL SE KAHA KAY ARAY BHAI TUM KITNAY PARHAY LIKHAY HO.DOOSRAY PAGAL NAY JAWAB DIA KAY YAAR MAIN M.A TU KER CHUKA HOON AB MATRIC KERNA BAQI HAI

A man got a call from his doctor who said ""I have some bad news and some terrible news, which would you rather hear first?""
The man says ""The bad news.""
The doctor says ""The lab messed up your tests and when they re-did them, they found out you only have 48 hours to live!""
The man exclaimed ""What could be more terrible than that!!??""
The doctor replied ""we tried all day yesterday to get hold of you but your phone was busy!""

Geedar nay kisan say kaha kih wo ous kay kharbozay khain gay
kisan nay kaha kaisay main raat ko pehra doon ga
geeder nay kaha kabhi to soo gay no hum tab kha lain gay
kisan nay main kutay khait main rakhho ga
geedar nay kaha kutay so to humari rishta dari hum phir bhi khha lain gay
kisan nay kaha main khait kay ird gird 100- ounchi devar khari kar doon ga
geedar bola
yeh chaukidari naheen yeh to YAKI HO gai

judge:tum per ilzam hai k tum nay khazanay to loota hai apnay ikhtiarat ka faida uthaay hooway. Tum khud bataoo thumaray saath kya keeya jayea
Mujrim: bus janab mujhay bhi saudia arib bajah dain

char dost namaz parh rahe hote hain keh pehla dost kehta hai keh woh dekho patang ur rahi hai. dosra keta hai keh chup namaz main bola nahin karte.tesra dost kehta hai keh namaz main bolne par Khuda ki lanat hoti hai. chota dost kehta hain keh shukhar hai main nahin bola

EK ADMI KI ANKHAEN KHARAB THEE OH DOCTOR K PASS GAYA OR KAHA KE DOCTOR SAHAB MUJH KO EK ADMI DO NAZAR ATHE HAE.DOCTOR NE KAHA K KYA AP CHARO KO YAHYE BIMARI HAY .DOCTOR KO EK CHAR NAZAR ARAHE THE

customer:haan khan saahib yeh piyaaz kiya hisaab se rahe ho?
Sabziwala:poora 20 roopiya kilo mera bhai.
customer:20 roopiya!!!nahin nahin yeh to bohat bol rahe ho 15 lagao to loonga.
Sabziwala:oh nahin mera bhai sone jaisa daana hai kaisay de de.
Customer:acha chalo 18 laga do aur saare de do.
Sabziwala:are nahin bhai saahib hum ko to bechna hi nahin hai na.
Customer:are ek to saare le raha hoon aur oopar se 18 roopay fee kilo bhi de raha hoon phir bhi nahin de rahe.
Sabziwala:saare to bechna hi nahin hai na mera bhai.
Customer:magar saare kiyoon nahin bechnay tum ko?
Sabziwala:oay khocha saara tum ko bech dega to phir poora din hum kiya bechega?

Plane Take-off Kerne K Bad ek Air-Hostess Ney Kuch Anounce Kiya Aur Mic Ka Button Band Kerna Bhool gaee.. Dosari Taraf Pilot Dosare Pilot Se Kehne Laga K Abhi Mein Chai Pi Loon Us K Bad Mera Air-Hostess K Saath Romance Kerne Ko Dil Charaha Hai..Aur Yeh Sab Baatein Air-hostess K Saath Sab Sun Rahey Thay..Ab Air-Host Ne Socha K Mein Jaldi Se Mic Band Ker Dey Ti HOON.. Jase Hi Woh MIc Band Kerne K Liyeh BhaGi. To Ek Bhudhe Ki Tang Se Takra K Gir Gahi...BHudey NE Kaha "" To Bari BEy-Sabri Hai""..""Suna Nahi Pehley Woh Chai Piyeh Ga""........