knock knock
whos there
santa
santa who
santa clothes

baigum, tum nay aaj bhi humra nizam jon ka toun hai. khuc bhi nahi badla. sab khuc wasa hi hai jaisa phle taha. koi jaga asi nahijahn baizat aadmi saqon say baith sace ab mujhe hi khuc kerna hoga. main bhi is mulk ka baizat sheri hon . ek mhube watan saheri hone kay nate mera ferz banta hai kay main bhi riyasat kay qawaneen drust kerne kay liye madakhlat keron .""
"" phle aap apni halat to drust kerlijye "". begum nay tank ker kaha .""mere samne ulta pajma pahen ker agye.""

Banta was booked into Airindia flight to bombay,But as this was his first time in an aeroplane,He made few preprations that were out of place.
When the stewardess came arround to take orders for the in-flight meal,Banta declared loudly,""I have brought my own lunch,Make sure you don-t charge me for food and drinks!""
so,as everbody was given their in-flight meal,Banat began spreading out his own home-cooked meal,The man sitting next to him was an american history researcher and was curious about the food.
""Excuse me,What is that drink?""He asked
Banta picked up the yogurt-based lassi drink and said,""Milk of India!""
Then banta took out several pieces of chappatis and started feasted.
""And what is this dish?""asked the curious american
""Wheat of India!"" replied banta.
Finally,Banta took out some desserts,he offered some to the american.
""what is it?""asked the american.
""Sweet of india"" replied the banta.
After the meal,everyone was setting down when there was a loud ""poooooooot"" sound(fart) from banta.
""what was that?""asked the american,holding his nose in disgust.
Banat replied coolly,that-s AIR INDIA.

One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, ""Please send me a sister.""
Santa Clause wrote him back, ""Ok, send me your mother.""

aik martaba aik jannati ko aik farishta nazar ata hai wqoh us kay pass ja ker kehta hai ----mujhey zara dozakhi loagoon ka haal to dikhaOo----farishta us ko aik ainay mein dikhata hai,kay saray dozakhioon ko PALAOO,BRYANI OR CHARGHAY DIAY JA RAHEY HAIN,JABKEY JANNATIOON KO AAM KHANA MIL RAHA HAI,TO WOH SHIKAYAT KARTA HAI,FARISHTA KEHTA HAI KEH---- BHAI JAHAAN LOAGG HI KAM HOON TO UN KAY LIAY TO PHIR ROKHA SOKHA HI BANTA HAI----

Jurassic Park!
Banta went to see the movie Jurassic Park, which was running to packed houses in Chandigarh. One of the shots showed the dinosaurs running directly towards the audience and Banta lowered in his seat.
Seeing his state, his friend, Santa asked, Kyon, kya baat hai? Dar kyoun lag raha hai? Cinema hi hai. (Why, what`s the matter? Why are you afraid? It s only a film.)
Banta replied, AAdmi hoon aur akkal hai, pata hai ki cinema hai...lekin voh to jaanwar hai, usko kya kya pata! (I am human and have a mind, I know it s a film...but that is an animal, what does it know!)

Ringing bells !
Santa with two red ears went to his doctor.
The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear.
Oh Dear! the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. But.. What happened to your other ear?
The scoundrel called back

An Englishman, an American and Santa are called upon to test a lie detector.
The Englishman says: I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer.
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
Ok, he says, 10 bottles.
And the machine is silent.
The American says: I think I can eat 15 hamburgers.
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
Allright, 8 hamburgers.
And the machine is silent.
The Santa says: I think...,
BUZZZZZZ goes the mac

Kaun Banega Crorepati...
Santa goes to Kaun Banega Karodpati show. Amitabh Bachchan asks him, Santaji aap kiske saath yahan aaye hai?
Santa : Pitaaji ke saath.
Amitabh : Aap ke pitaaji ka shubhnaam?
Santa : Hmm.... yes.
Amitabh : Amm.... kya naam hai aapke pitaji ka?
Santa : Hmm... OK.
Amitabh : Are Santaji, main aapse aapke pitaji ka naam poochh raha hoon
Santa : Pehle mujhe chaar options to do ! ! !