Yaad

aik gullukaar apnay paroosee say shikayat kerta hai kay main jaab bhee ghana gata hon app ka kutta bhoonkna shooro ker daita hai too parosee jawab daita hai ""is main kuttay ka kia kasoor hai pehal(start) too app hi kertay hai na! ""

doo mian biwi ki rooz larayee hua kertee thee akhir aik din mian tang aa ker kehta hai ""ya Allah.. mujhay zinda nahi rehna mujhay utha lay.."" biwi us say bhee ziyada tang ayee huee hootee hai wo bhee yahee kehtee hai ""ya Allah mujhay bhee zinda nahi rehna.. mujhay bhee utha lay.."" ye suun ker mian kehta hai ""ya Allah main nay jo dua maangi wo bhool ja aur ye dua kabool ker lay!""...

aik dafa aik admi aik hotel main giya aur waiter to kaha kay mujhay ""fried fish chahyee aur hamdardee kay doo bool..."".. waiter nay kaha aur kuch to us admi nay boola ""hamdardee kay doo bool.."" to waiter nay admi kay kaaan main kaha ""fried fish maat kahayee 2 din ki baasi hai.""

aik dafa aik admi aik china main aik chinese hotel main jata hai jaab wo menu deekhta hai too saab kuch chinese main likha hoota hai usay chinese nahi atee hootee khair wo bara soochnay kay baad waiter ko bollata hai aur menu par point ker kay kehta hai kay ye last walee lay aooo... to waiter us ko english main kehta hai ""sorry sir main ye dish too nahi laa sakta keooon kay ye too hamaree hotel ki malkan ka naam hai""....

aik dafa aik sikh aik dookaan main jata hai jis kay baray main ye mashoor hoota hai kay wahaaan say dunya ki haar cheez milltee hai.. wahaan ja ker wo aik tv deekhta hai usay wo bara pasand aata hai wo salesman say poochta hai ""ye tv kitnay ka hai?"" to salesman jawab daita hai ""hum sikhoon ki tv nahi bachtay"".. usay bohat ghussa aata hai.. wo ye sooch laita hai tay wo yahee tv lay ker hee rahay ga.. to aglay din wo bhais badal ker jata hai aur poochta hai ""ye tv kitnay ka hai?"" to phir salesman jawab daita hai ""hum sikhoon ko tv nahi bachtay"" wo bohat hairaan hoota hai kay usay doosray roop main bhee salesman nay pehchaan lia .. aglay din wo clean shave kerta hai aur baloon ki bhee cutting kerwa daita hai aur phir usee dukaan main ja ker poochta hai ""ye tv kitnay ka hai?"" too salesman phir yahee jawab daita hai ""hum sikhoon ko tv nahi bachtay""... ab to wo pakka faisla hee ker laita hai kay wo ye tv lay ker hee rahay ga.. to aglay din wo aik aurat kay roop main burka pehan ker jata hai aur poochta hai ""ye tv kitnay ka hai?"" to phir salesman usay yahee jawab daita hai ""kay hum sikhoon ko tv nahi bachtay"" wo tang aa jata hai aur poochta hai akhir tum mujhay har baree kaisay pehchan laitay hooo?? tooo salesman kehta hai jesay app 4 deoon say tv keh rahay hain wo tv nahi washing machine hai!

kamra-e-imtihaan main 2 larkay nahyat parishaan thay keoon kay invigilator un kay darmiyaan khara tha.. akhir aik larkay nay invigilator ko aik paper dia jis ko parhtay hi wo apnee seat par ja ker baith gia .. to doosray larkay nay poocha kay akhir tum nay aisa kia likha tha kay wo apnee seat par ja ker baith gia?.. too doosray larkay nay jawab dia.. main nay likha tha ""sir app ki pent peechay say phatee hoowee hai.. "" ;)

hmmm arz kia hai:
chitti kameez tay kala phool karhaii da
ik tay odhee yaad sitayee utoon fiqr parhaai da

AK DAFA KHAN SAB NAY JOTY PAHNY GAR SE NIKALTAY HAY APNA MOO BILL KULL NECHE DEKHTY HOWE APNE CAHPAL KO DEAKTAY HOWE ACCHNAK CHPALL SE 1inch KAY FASLAY PER KOUCH A JA TA HAY KHAN SAB AGY POW KO BARATAY HAY PER RUK JATAY HAY PEHR POW{FOOT}KO BARATAY HAY PER RUK JA TAY HAY PER BAETH{SIT}KAR CHAKH TAY KARTY OR KAHTY AHY OO ACHA HOWA HAM NA PWE NAHE RAKHA YE TOO GOBAR HAY

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and asks for a drink. After a few minutes, the bartender hears a phone ring. He sees the man lift up his hand and start talking into it. When he stops talking, the bartender asks,
""What are you doing?""

The man says, ""I-m a telephone company executive.I use the phone so much I got a phone implanted in my hand.""

Of course, the bartender didn-t believe him, so the man asked the bartender for the bar-s phone number. He punches it into his hand and the bar-s phone rings! The bartender can-t believe this.
These two soon became good friends. About three drinks later, the man asks where the bathroom is. After about ten minutes, the bartender starts to get worried and thinks that maybe he horted out his hand when he was washing his hands. The bartender walks into the bathroom and sees the man standing there with toilet paper crammed up his
butt.

The bartender asks, ""What are you doing?
""The man says, ""I-m just waiting for a fax.""
note""all my jokes are copied from www.37.com""