Jokes

Vajypayee-s driver is driving along a back country road on the way back to Patna, when all of a sudden a small pig jumps out in front of the car. The pig dies on the spot. Vajpayee, upset, tells the chauffeur to go find the owner of the piglet so that he can pay for the damages. The driver is gone for two hours and when he comes back, he has a bag full of money, and a wondering look on his face. Vajapayee wants to know what happened. The driver tells him ""Hum jab gaaon me pahuncha to dekha kuch log perh ke neeche baithe hain. Jub hum unko bataya ki kya hua hai, tab sare log jama ho gaye. Humko laga ki aaj to hamari pitayee hogee. Par hum dekha ki sare log paisa jama kar rahe hain. Hum socha ki ye sara piasa wo janvar ke malik ke liye hai. Par un logon ne saara paisa hamein de diya.
""Vajpayee says ""Theek theek batao. Tum unko kya bola tha? ""
The driver replies ""Hum kaha ki hum Vajapayee ka driver hoon aur hum sooar ka bachcha ko maar diya hoon.""
he he he

A mother asks her son why he's takin so long to finish his juice. Her son replies ""But MOMMMMM....It says ""CONCENTRATE"".

aik martaba naseerudin aik martaba kise buliding ki chat par baithaa hoota hay aik fakir nicay say uss koo bulata hay jaab naseer upar say nicay aata hay to fakir uss koo kehta hay aik rupia daidi baba mullah naseer uss koo upar laikay jata hay aur kehta hay maff kar do baba .

ek bacha apni ammi kay pass bhaga bhaga ata hai or kheta hai kay kitchen main ek admi masi ki beti ko pakat ker khada hai job ammi jati hai tu masi ki beti akely hoti hai pechay say beta khet hai aprail fool aprail fool wo koi aur nahi dad thay

Little Johnny walks up to his Aunt and says , -my God, Aunt Edna why are
you so damn ugly?- His mother overhears this, pulls Johnny into the kitchen. and screams,
-how ould you say that your aunt is so damn ugly!- -Because she is,- says Little Johnny.
His mother says, -You go back in there and apologize to her, right now! I mean
it, go tell her that you-re sorry!-
Little Johnny goes into the living room, walks over to his aunt and says, -Aunt Edna, I am
sorry you-re so damn ugly.-

Want to hear two short jokes and a long joke?
Joke. Joke. Joooooooooooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkke.

Ek admi kay pass ek totee hotii hai joo bohat galeeyan daytee thi us totee ka malik us totee say pareeshan tha,yea baat who apnay doost koo bata hai,uss ka doost bolta hai koi masla hii nahi hai mairay pass doo namazii parhaizgar doo totay hain unn kay choor doo theek hoo gayee gi to who admi apnee totee apnay doost ko daydayta hai.jab totee ko ek totaa dakhta hai who doosray totay ko koonee markar bolta hai sijday say uutth gaaooo hamaree doowa qabool hooo gaee hai

howa yoon ke aik din main jara ha tha.aur mujhe chalte waqt kuch nazar nahin aata ahi.tu main apni dhoondh main jara ha tha.ke saamne se 2 khoubsorat lerkiyaan nazar aain.main ne un ko dekha hi nahin aur un ki upper gir gya.phir aap mat pochian ke mera kiya howa.un hone mujhe aisa sunaya ke mere 14 tabaq roshan ho gai.mere sath yeh waqiaa abhi kuch din pehley pech aaya tha.please dont smiling in your face.

aik martaba ustaad shgird say poochta hay kay mango tornay kaa acha moosam kaab hoota hay to shagird kehta hay jaab baagh may maali naa hoo too achaa moosam hoota hay .