Jokes

A commpnly seen warning sign on public transport buses reads::::::
Look under ur seats,there could be a bomb.Raise alarm.Earn reward.
A chartered bus meant for college-going girls had the warning altered:::::
LOok under ur seat ;it may be a boy. dont raise alarm; take HIM HOME AS A REWARD.

aik din mein jungle mein ja raha tah samanay say aik sher aya woh meri taraf daikh kar daharah mein be chekkah us na sir helaya and then me to us na meri ankhoo mein ankhein dallieh mein na be pir us na dum helai idhar mein rah gaya pir woh mery taraf bahga lekin mein us ke taraf nahien pehchay ke taraf

aik din aik sahafi paghal khanay jata hay tu wahaan daikhta hay keh aik admi bara sooted booted ho kar baitha akhbar parh raha hay who uss say poochta hay kia tum paghal ho waho kehta hay keh naheen phir sahafi poochta hay tu tum yahaan kia kar rahay ho who kehta hay drasal main nay aik kataab likhi thi horeses (goroon) par who bi 2hazar safat ki sahafi bara heran hota hay aor bagh paghal khanay kay manijar kay paas jata hay aor uss saay kehta hay keh tum nay hamaray shubay kay aik mozaz admi ko paghl khanay main daal rakha hay kia tum naheen jantay uss nay ghooroon par kataab likhi hay who bi 2hazr safat ki manijar kehta hay keh sir ham jantay hain keh uss nay kattab likhi hay magar app naheen jantay uss nay kataab main kia likha hay sahafi kehta hay kia likha hay manijar kehta hay dagar dagar dagar dagar dagar dagar dagar

ek dafa ek aadmi kisi chakkar mein phans gaya aur phir us ko police ne pakar liya..... woh wakeel ki paas gaya aur kaha ke mujhe koi tarkeeb batao jis ki waja se mein iss museebat se nikal jaoon.... wakeel ne kaha no problem ..... wakeel kehta hai ke jub judge tum se koi bhi sawal karey tou tum pagal ban jaana aur ulti seedhi harkatein karna .... us ne kaha ok..... jab judge ne us se poocha ke batao tumhara naam kiya hai tou woh bola ""LALLU PAGAL CHU CHU"" phir judge ne poocha tum ko police ne kyoun pakra tou woh dobara bola ""LALLU PAGAL CHU CHU"" phir judge ne poocha ke kya tum pagal ho tou woh bola ""LALLU PAGAL CHU CHU"" .... judge ne fesla kya ke yeh tou pagal hai isay chorr do....... adalat ke bahar wakeel ne us se poocha dekha meri tarkeeb kaisi thi tum bach gayeeee.... ab laoo meri fees tou woh bola ""LALLU PAGAL CHU CHU"".... ha ha ha

ustad shagerd se loha garam kar ke kahta hai
cha cha cha cha chote
shagerd ja ja ja ja ji ustad
ustad hath hath hathora lao
shagerd ustad cha cha chaota ya ba ba bara
cha cha cha chor de loha thanda ho geya hai

Aik mirasy marnay say pahlay waseiat karta hay kay meri kabar main do tea cup (chaiy kay cup) rakh dana uss kay ghar walay aisa hee kartay hain jab farishtay uss say hisaab kitaab lanay aatay hain aur kahtay hain kay hissab kitaab do to woh kahta hain aap kaoun hain tou farishtay kahtay hain hum hissab kitaab walay farishtay hain tou woh kahta hay tou phir woh koun thay jou yah do cup chaiy pee gay hain ?

ek american pakistan aata hai woh taxi rok ker kehta hai clifton jaana hai taxi wala kehta hai main nahen jaa raha abhi joogar karta hoon american poochta hai ye joogar kya hai taxi wala kehta hai joogar nahen bataoon ga bohat keemti hai doosri taxi main bitha deta hai doosri taxi raastay main kharab ho jaati hai american poochta hai abb kya ho ga taxi waala kehta hai abhi joogar karta hoon american poochta hai joogar kya hai taxi wala kehta hai joogar keemti hai nahen batoon ga american wapus america aata hai bush poochta hai pakistan main kya dekha wo kehta hai aur to kuch nahen un kai paas joogar hai bush bara heran hota hai aur musharaf ko pohone ker kay poochta hai joogar chahiey musharaf kehta hai joogar nahen mil sakta keemti hai bush kehta hai jang kai liey tayyar ho jao musharaf kehta hai koie baat nahen men abi joogar kerta hoon.

lahore main loog bhaut mahman nawaz hotay han main jab wahan gya too breakfast main bhee phajhay day payy,lunch main bhee phajhay day paye,tea kay sath bhee phajhay dae paye ,dinner main bhee phajhay dae pay... main bola kay kiya bhance intoon per khari ho gee

LIKHNA THA KHOON SAY,LIKH DEYA SIYAHI SAY
MERNA THA MUOT SAY, MER GAYE WAFAYI SAY
AGAR NAHIN KARNA THA PYAR TO PHELE BATA DETAY
ITNI HASEEN DUNIYA HAI KAHIN AUR DIL LAGA LAYTAY.