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Santa goes to buy a underwear.
On choosing one he asks: How much for this?
Shopkeeper: Rs 500
Santa: Arey bhai daily waer dikhaao, Party wear nahin chahiye.

Santa went to see a girl for marriage.
Their families decided to leave them for some talk.
After some time,
Santa asks: Behenji, tusin kinne behen-bhai ho?
Girl: Vaise taan 3 si, par hun 4 ho gaye si.

Santa Banta zid kar rahe c monkey dekhan di...
so tuhade ghar da address dita hai.
Yaar 2-4 tapusian maar ke dikha deo bichare khush ho jaan ge.

Petrol ke rate badhane par santa bola
"" Menu koi farak nahin penda.
Pehele bhi 100 ka bharwata tha , ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon

Santa: Is operation se mujhe kuchh ho gaya to isi doctor se shadi kar Lena.
Jeeto: Aise kyo kah rahe ho?
Santa: Doctor se badla Lene ka yehi 1 rasta hai!

Santa: Bhai, har roz murge nal roti khaidee hai.
Banta: Yaar, Oh kiven?
Santa: Ik burki aap khaidee aae te ik murge nu paayee di hai.

Santa suffering from cold was shivering. His son called a doc.
Doc: wht happened?
Son: Bimari da ta pata nahun par baapu saver da VIBRATION mode te lagaya hai

Santa goes to buy a underwear. On choosing one he asks: How much for this?
Shopkeeper: Rs 500
Santa: Arey bhai daily waer dikhaao, Party wear nahin chahiye.

While walking in the highlands Santa fell down a deep hole.
Banta: R u ok?
Santa: Yeah!
Banta: Did u break anything?
Santa: No, there's nothing down here

Santa & Banta got tired of mobile & decide 2 use pigeons. 1day a pigeon reaches Banta without message. Angry Banta calls Santa!
Santa: Oye, this was a missed call.

Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.
Banta: Santa u'll die.
Santa: U'll die bcoz haven’t u heard train is coming on platform?

A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out

Santa went to see a gal for marriage. Their families decided to leave them for some talk. After some time, Santa asks: Behenji, tusin kinne behen-bhai ho?
Girl: Vaise taan 3 si, par hun 4 ho gaye.

Santa Singh is called for an interview in some firm. He lands there
on time. He is immediately hauled inside in front of the
interviewing officer. Officer looks at Santa singh Then goes thru his
certificates and then starts asking him questions.

Following is the transcript :

O : Mr. Santa Singh, after seeing your qualifications & credentials
I would like to ask you only some simple questions. If you can
answer those then you are selected. First we will start with some
opposites

S : Yes Sir.

Officer started asking questions

O : Above
S : Below
O : Front
S : Back
O : Left
S : Right
O : Male
S : Female
O : Ugly (means Next in Punjabi)
S : Pichhly (means Previous in Punjabi)
O : Ugly...U-G-L-Y( Officer spells it)
S : Pichhly...P-I-C-H-H-L-Y( Our sardar also spells it)
O : U.....G.....L ...... Y.....(Officer shouts)
S : P ..... I ..... C ..... H ....... H ...... L ..... Y......
Our sardar also shouts)

#Officer is now angry.
O : Get out
S : Come in.
O : Quiet please.
S : Talk please.
O : You are rejected.
S : I am selected ........ ....... and This is how Santa Singh got
his job.

Santa Singh is walking the other day and comes across a banana peel on the road. Can you guess what he must be thinking ?? ""Saala aaj bhi girna padega...""

Santa singh and Banta singh are employed in a computer hardware store as movers. One day both of them are asked to move some computers. Santa Singh being energetic that day doesn-t feel the computer to be heavy at all. At the same time he sees that Banta Singh is struggling very hard to lift his computer. And this Santa Singh says "" What Banta, my comp has 500 MB HD and yours has just 250, even then u cannot lift it ???"" At this Banta Singh thinks for a while and replies ""Thats right, but my HD is full and urs is empty""

Once upon a time ther were two brother santa singh and Banta singh. After many years Banta was going to meet santa. When he called santa to know here he and how to reach him.
Santa told him his add and instructions when u come to my house Park your house behind my house open the door by kicing with your foot then press the elevator button with right elbow then upstair knock my door with left elbow.
WHen Banta reachedand meet him he asked santa wat was the matter to press and knock with elbows.
guess wat
.
.
Banta tell him that he wanted to make sure you are not coming with empty hands.

One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, ""Please send me a sister.""
Santa Clause wrote him back, ""Ok, send me your mother.""

Santa falls in luv with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally
writes a love letter to her: I luv u sister.
aries_usman@hotmail.com
kyun_bata0@yahoo.com
0300-4383274

Santa falls in love with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: I luv u sister 00966560356101

Santa declares: I--ll never marry in my life and I--ll give same advice to my children also.




if u like to contact then 03214041419

Santa enters a store that sell curtains.

He tells the salesman, I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains.

The salesman assured him that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed him several patterns, but Santa seemed to be having a hard time choosing.

Finally, he selects a lovely pink floral print.

The salesman asked what size curtains he needed.

Santa replies, Fifteen inches.

Fifteen inches? asked the salesman. That sounds very small, what room are they for?

Santa tells him that they aren--t for a room, they are for his computer monitor.

The surprised salesman replies, But, sir, computers do not have curtains!

Santa says, Hellllooooooooo........I--ve got Windows!

Muhammad Arshad
0334-5053889

A man was brought in to the hospital intensive care ward, put in a bed, tubes coming out everywhere. A week later, another man was admitted, in a similar condition.

Both lay there, machines pinging, tubes poking etc. a couple more weeks before one of them had the strength to raise his hand and point to himself and say, Bengali.

The other patient signaled he had heard, raised his own hand, and said, Punjabi.

This act tired them out so badly it was a week before the first summoned up the strength to say, Calcutta.

Other replied in a weedy frail voice, Ludhiana.

Once more, the strain was too much for them both and they passed out. Days passed before the first patient managed to again point to himself and say, Asit.

Replied the other, Santa.

A few hours later, Asit managed to point to himself again and rasp out weakly, Cancer.

Santa responded, Sagittarius.

Muhammad Arshad
0334-5053889

Santa! Your daughter has died!
Depressed, Sardar jumps from 100th floor
At 50th floor he remembers I don--t have a daughter!
At 25th floor: I--m unmarried!
At 10th floor: I--m Banta not Santa

............................................

Sunnycheema36@hotmail.com
OR
03458610636
......

Santa Singh and Banta Singh landed up in Bombay. They managed to get into a
double- decker bus. Santa Singh somehow managed to get a bottom seat, But
unfortunate Banta got pushed to the top. After a while when the rush is over, Santa
went upstairs to see friend Bannta Singh. He met Banta in a bad condition clutching
the seats in front with both hands, scared to death. He says, “ Banta Singh! What
the heck’s going’ on? Why are you scared ? I was enjoying my ride down there ?”
Scared Banta replies. “Yeah, but you’ve got a *driver.* “

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