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There are always three speeches, for every one you actually gave. The one you practiced, the one you gave, and the one you wish you gave.


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One day an old lady was sitting at her old home with her old dog. A fairy suddenly pops up next to her. It tells her, You have lived a good life. I will now grant you three magic wishes.

The old women thinks for a minute, and then makes up her mind. She says, My first wish is that I will be young and beautiful again. POOF! She is.

My second wish is that I am very rich and live in a mansion. POOF! Her tattered, old house becomes a magnificent mansion, and she is the richest person in the world.

My third wish is that my old dog will become a handsome young man and will be deeply in love with me. POOF! The old, mangy dog becomes what she wishes,a handsome man, with a beautiful face, and tender longing eyes.

He then leans over and whispers into her ear, Honey, aren--t you sad you got me fixed?



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